Get Over It

You know that saying get over it or move on with your life or let it go those should be banned from using.  Just because it might be something that to you seems simple to move on from could be extremley different for somebody else.  My son would be 8 years old today if he had made it.  He died when he was just 5 hours.  Everybody, except myself, goes on like its another day.They dont speak his name its not like he even exsisted.  Today my husband of all people asked me what was wrong.  It was his son too but he is one of the ones that goes on pretending it didnt happen.  I havr been told "he was just a baby there aint no reason to grieve.  Its not like you raised him or anything."  or "you have other healthy kids, forget about what you dont have."  and my all time personal favorite "you should love the ones that are here with you instead of the ones that are dead."      Maybe all that is true but I just cant do it.  I have 2 boys that are angels and I just cant go on acting like they were never born.  So when I hear "get over it" whether or not the person is trying to help I still get very upset.  So please keep in mind when using them simply harmless sayings you might just be really upsetting somebody.

Its Been A While so let me let you in on what I've learned.

Its been a while since I have posted anything on here.  Mostly because I went through a stage of not knowing what to write then getting busy with work and life etc.  Back in August of 2012 my husband and I lost his Aunt.  It was devastating to all of us but we held on and got through it.  Then in November 2012 we lost my grandpa.  We weren't real close with grandpa anymore but it was still hard.  In February of this year we bought some land and have had a mobile put out there for my husbands parents.  We have another mobile we are having put out there for us and my mom until we either get our house built or find her one.  In July this year 1 day shy of 11 months that my husbands aunt passed my dad passed.  We moved in with mom to help her for a month or two and just decided to stay until after the holidays.  I about lost my best friend in a car accident.  She was riding with a drunk driver and he wrecked the car.  They had to use the jaws of life to get her out.  She had a major tear in her aorta and was in critical condition for a while there.  This year hasn't been all bad though!  We have boomed with our business.  I have a precious new niece.  My friend pulled through and is back home with her 4 children.  I am closer with my momma than I have ever been.  So you see its not been a completely bad year.  My husband wanted to do his best to make this a good Christmas for all of us since we had been through so much and he did.  He went above and beyond. I have the best husband for me.  Like I said in the title, I'm going to let you in on what I have learned. 

1.  Family is NOT just blood.  Family is what you make it.  Since my husbands aunt has been gone her husband (married into the family) has been to more of my family events.  He is just like a second dad to me and was there for me more than anybody else when my dad passed. 

2.  Nobody knows how much time they have left.  Its not written in stone so make sure you make the most of every day.

3.  Get right with that person that you have issues with.  Especially if its a close loved one.  You never know when you might loose that loved one and you won't have the chance to get right.  I was fortunate enough to let me dad know exactly how I felt and how much I love him. 

4.  Take it all in.  The good times and the bad.  It will make you stronger.

5.  God never gives you more than what you can handle.  And Ive found myself saying he must think I'm a body builder or something but I know I will get through it. 

6.  Just be yourself.  No matter what just be yourself. 

7.  Don't make changes in your life unless you are the one that wants them.  This goes back to #6. 

8.  Don't forget what's important.  You can have all the money in the world but you can't take it with you.  Don't get so caught up in life that you forget your family and friends.

9.  Cherish your loved ones even if you do have to care for them when they're sick.  I know its hard but when they are that ill they don't want you to have to do it as much if not more than you don't want to do it.  Be patient.  You might be in they're shoes one day.  Like I said we can't plan what's going to happen to us. 

10.  Its been a long road and its going to continue to be a long road but I know that no matter how tough it gets it could always get worse so don't take it for granted. 

Well I guess that's my words of wisdom.  I will try to be a more proficient blogger but it probably won't happen.  Just don't take life to seriously, live it while you can. 

Days like this

"Momma always said thered be days like this"  The bad part momma never said there would be days like this.  Days that are so bad all I want to do is find a hiding place that nobody knows about and hide my head and cry.  It seems like nothing is going right.  Work was slamming for a few weeks and has now slowed down once again.  Everybody is sick and dying or has died.  My husband and I have been fighting alot and just got into a huge fight and didn't work it out and now we can't fight because of the kids being around.  I feel like I am never allowed to be myself anymore because myself isn't acceptable to anybody else.  I am praying that this feeling will go away but I don't just know.  I am not the happy go luck optimistic faithful to God girl I used to be.  I fear everything.  Like I said its just a bad day.  Pray that this gets better

Aging

Its something that happens to all of us.  Aging.  As my birthday is coming up soon, to soon, I am feeling the effects of aging all to much.  My husband and I were talking today and realized our youngest our baby will be 5 in 2 days.  Our oldest is 10.  10 thats just 3 years away from a teenager!  Our middle daughter is 7.  They age soo fast.  But that brings up the issue if they age fast that means we do too.  I am just a few days away from my 29 birthday which means 30 is just around the corner (as I keep being reminded and I don't need to be).  But I love my life even if I am aging quickly.  So I will keep doing what I am doing and keep aging because one we can' avoid it and 2 I wouldn't have it any other way. 

Confusion and stressful decisions.

I haven't written anything on here lately because Ive been really busy.  Ive also been contemplating a big decision.  I found out a big secret Christmas of 2010 that I have been keeping ever since.  I don't know what to do because it really bothers me.  I don't know what to do.  I can't talk to my family about it.  I have a few friends I can talk to but its such a difficult and sticky situation I don't know what to do.  Ive been praying and praying but I still don't know.  Well I better get off here I will keep everybody updated

Think before you speak

Saturday I got my feelings hurt from a friend who told me I was a bad influence to the young Dandie Girls because I got "knocked up" at 17 and got decided to keep the baby and gave up my college career.  It really hurt and made me upset and then mad.  The reason I am posting this is to say something.  We need to think before we speak.  What I did when I was 17 was what I felt was right and still do.  I am very happily married and love my children and wouldn't change that for the world.  What you might think is a bad decision might be the right decision for that person.  Don't judge someone just because you don't agree with their decisions.  Ok that is all I have vented.

Life

Here lately life has been busy.  The kids are wrapping up with school work is busy Tommy had a dentist appointment and had 2 teeth pulled.  We added 2 chihauauas to the family.  I just got through bathing all 4 dogs and the cat so Im pooped.  I have a lot of stuff weighing on my mind and hard choices to make so I have been a little preoccupied.  I keep praying and I know the answer is right in front of me but either answer I choose could be right or wrong in its own way and have its on consequences.  Well I better get off here and finish my house work.  Hope everybody has a great day